Loco LL

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Growing baby, growing family...and other things.

So, if you didn't know, a newborn is supposed to regain their birth weight by the time they are 2 weeks. India was 8.1 when she was born and dropped to 7.6 at 2 days old. Yesterday, at 2 weeks, she weighed 8.9. I would say she is getting plenty of milk! She is also 211/2 inches!! She is going to be my tallest child. I can tell because her feet are so long, she doesn't fit in her size 0 shoes! Everyone keeps giving her 0-3 months clothes, and i am trying to get her in all of these cute outfits before she outgrows them, which won't be long.
This is a picture of our family of 6(if you include a canine) right before Chris left for his trip to Atlanta on Sunday. Chris' mom is staying with me until he gets back on Thursday. She has been taking the kids to school which has been nice. It is too cold to be taking India out and waiting outside for Alexa to get let out of school. I am freaking out a bit about having to do this on my own with a 4yr old and an infant.
Here is India just showing some of her personality. I know I am bias but she is so stinking cute!

Moriah said something cute yesterday that I had to throw in here. She said that she felt like Jesus was trying to get out of her heart because her heart hurt. I think her heart was pounding or something, but she said that it felt better after I gave her ice-cream and Jesus decided to stay in there. A few weeks ago she asked if India could see Jesus because she was inside me and Jesus was in my heart so India must be able to see Him. Pretty amazing thoughts, huh?

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

India had her 1 week check up with the midwife yesterday. It was her first time out of the house. I hated taking her out in the cold. Well, she got a clean bill of health and is growing nicely.

She weighed in at 7lbs 14ozs which is how much Alexa was at birth. I still can't get over how big India is. Her feet almost don't fit in the booties that Moriah wore until she was 3 months! I love how different my girls are from one another even though they look so much alike.
India is coming down with a little cold which I am certain she caught from Alexa, even though we have been super cautious. She doesn't seem to mind it. I have just been nursing a lot and keeping her head elevated. I only used the snot sucker once and she didn't cry. She had her first real bath today too since her cord stump fell of yesterday. The girls were so excited because now they can help with diapers. We'll see how long that excitement lasts:)
My mom left this morning. It was sad to see her go. It has been so nice having her here. And the girls love having her here as well. I am beginning to get hit with the reality of having 3 kids. The hardest part is thinking about picking Alexa up at school. I haven't done it yet, but I am not looking forward to it.
Thank God India has been a good sleeper so far. I have really needed the sleep and I know it might not last, so I am taking advantage of it.

I have had a few people call really upset about my job situation so I thought I should clear up a couple of things. I knew I would be getting unpaid maternity leave since I hadn't worked a full 12 months yet. That part was clear, but I was told my job and benefits would stay. I lost money because I had gone in to cancel my insurance with Einstein at the beginning of november. Human resources told me to hang onto it and cancel come January so I would get a $3500 bonus for waiving benefits for the new year. So I kept paying insurance for two months hoping to get that money. Now I won't get that money and I paid over $600 for insurance that I didn't need. I have been trying to get reimbursed but I doubt I will. My clinical manager is also going to talk to my boss to see if she will reconsider. So, we'll see. I have a peace about whatever the outcome at this point.
Also, I found out Alisons baby was a boy, and they had a funeral a couple of days ago. Still no word on the cause of his death. Keep them in your prayers.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

6 days old!

I can't believe India is going to be a week old tomorrow. With every baby, I always mourn the day. I love saying how many days old my baby is, and suddenly it turns to weeks, then months, then years. I don't want to miss a moment with this baby. I have not wanted to set up our swing yet because I have no use for it. I just want to hold her. She has not slept in her moses basket yet either and I don't want her to, though I know it will soon be necessary. I guess I am having a bit of the baby blues thinking about her growing up. But only a healthy bit of it to keep things into perspective. Losing my job doesn't bother me so much knowing that maybe in 12 weeks I just won't be ready to be away from her. So here are a few more photos of her. People keep saying she doesn't look like a newborn. Well, if you could hold her in your arms and feel her tiny legs and hear her tiny sounds, you would know she is. She may be big (she is weighing in at 7lb 4oz as of Thursday), but she is tiny to me and I know she will grow to be truly big soon, so I am going to enjoy every moment with her.

Friday, January 19, 2007

She's Awake...

India came out in complete contentment. After her initial cry, she was put on my chest and sat there checking out the world without a single cry for the rest of the evening. SHe slept through the night the first two nights and hardly has cried except when we change her diaper or clothes.

Well I had this feeling that this would be similar to our experience of buying our golden retreiver. When I picked out oskar from the litter, I chose the calmest pup because of having two children at home. He was so calm that we were worried he would be too boring. Well, the next day, he turned into a complete psycho dog and hasn't been calm since.
SO, I was just waiting for India to show us her true colors, and she did last night. She slept all day until we went to bed at 12, and she decided to start screaming. She didn't go back to sleep until 5 am!!! My milk has come in and I am so sore, I can hardly move, so Chris had to take over with her for a while. SO, it is 12pm and he is still sleeping. Well, of coarse she is a perfect angel now, sleeping contently in my dads arms after a good feeding and a bath. Hopefully last night wasn't a preview of what is to come.

On a side note, my human resources person from work called yesterday to inform me that they could not hold my job. She spoke with my boss and they are asking for my resignation. This is frustrating because I was upfront with them since my hire date abotu me taking this 12 wks off and they said it was fine, and I was supposed to get a chunk of money for declining benefits this year that I won't be getting now. There is nothing I can do about it obviously and I know they
will hire me back when I want to go back, so I am trying to look at the positive that I won't be bound to going abck after 12 weeks if I don't want to, and maybe I will even try applying for a few labor and delivery positions. Anyways, it is bittersweet news I guess, but seemed crappy initially.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Sad News...

Everything is going fine with India and I. The midwife came today and everything is great. Shortly after she left I got a call from my boss. She first asked how India was and all that and then said she had news and didn't want to put a damper on things. I knew what she was going to say. I had a really awful dream last night. I have a friend at work named Alison that was due the same week as me. It has been great having someone to go through the end of my pregnancy with. I hugged her just a few days ago saying good luck to her. This is their first born. Anyways, last night, I woke up crying after having a dream that I saw her and she had lost the baby. It was so real that I thought I should call my work to see if she had had the baby. Well, when my boss said she had news, I knew what it would be. Alisons mom had called the hospital last night to let everyonhe know that they were inducing Alison and there was no heart beat. This is all the details that I know now. I am blogging this because I am asking everyone to pray for Alison and her husband. I feel so incredibly unworthy to have this perfect child when my friend is mourning her loss. I don't know why I had that dream but I am sure God had his reasons for putting Alison so deelpy on my heart. Please lift her up in prayer. Thanks. I will blog some more pics of India soon..

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Introducing our precious India Shiloah!!

Here she is, after nearly 20 hours of labor. Born at 9:34 pm last night, at 8 lb 1 oz., our longest labor and our biggest baby!! She is definitly worth the wait though. Just to see her come out healthy and so content. I feel like our family has been completed with this new love. She is perfect in every way. She was wide eyed from the time she came out until about 1am when she fell asleep and pretty much has been sleeping since. It is amazing to think about what it must be like for a newborn to see the world for the first time. She latched on within 15 minutes and nursed all night. Today it has been a challenge waking her for her feedings, but this is to be expected after such a hard day of work. I am exhausted myself so it has been good to have her sleeping so sound. . I wish I had a picture of Chris catching the baby, but he did get to deliver India. It was an amazing experience for him. He handled it beautifully.
Alexa was very excited about the whole delivery. She did make a comment on how gross the blood was but I would have too if I was 7 and seeing all that blood. Cutting the cord was great for her though.
Moriah on the other hand wanted to stay out of our room until India was born. My mom hung out with her and Oskar in the back bedroom until someone went to tell them that she was out. Moriah was afraid to hear me scream.

I have had some e mails wanting details, so if you are interested, I will share. As I said, my water broke at 12 am on Martin Luther King day as Chris wanted. I labored through the night sleeping between contractions at about 9 minutes apart. I got up around 5am to eat and wait for my mom to show up. My contractions had gotten to 7 minutes apart but started slowing down to eventually only every 20 minutes. I called the midwife who said to lay back down and see if focusing on labor would help bring them back on. That just made them further apart. So I went in to the birth center at noon to be checked out and monitor the baby. Everything with India was fine but I was only 4 cms. She stripped my membranes and gave me blue and black Cohosh to take every 15 minutes to bring on contractions.. This helped some. Amber gave me a long massage and I got up to start walking around. I started going up and down the stairs, and my contractions came every 5 minutes. We called the midwife. Barbara arrived to our house around 5ish. Michelle was here by then as well. My contractions were getting harder so I went up to my room. Barbabra checked me and I was only 5 cms. I labored a while longer and my contractions wereonly 7 minutes apart though hard. She gave me more concentrated homeopathic blue cohosh. This really got the ball rolling. I walked around the upstairs with CHris until I was 8 cm. It was very soon after that that I delivered India. It was so great having Amber and Michelle there to support me and my mom was so great with Moriah. The whole experience was amazing, though long, tiring and painful, I can say today that I am so glad I was able to have a homebirth. I am mostly thanking God for this perfect child that I love so much. Thanks for all of your prayers. I can't wait for you all to meet her.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Finally!! I am in labor!

Well, Chris really wanted the baby to be born on Martin Luther King Junior Day. I went to becd about 11pm last night after watching the season premiere of 24 and going over our list of things we needed for a home birth one last time. I decided to call out sick from work because I had felt so tired all day yesterday. I was also very grumpy for no reason. Well at midnight, I was changing positions in bed and felt my water break. It is almost 6am now and my contractions are about 7 minutes apart and getting stronger. My mom just got her. I had called her immediately, and I will be calling everyone else within the next hour. (Amber, Michelle and my midwife.) I will post some pictures of India when she arrives. Hopefully it won't be too long:)

Sunday, January 14, 2007

That is one BIG Belly!!

Yep, she is still hanging in there. This is one week after my henna design. It is fading, but still looks great. So, I am past one of my due dates. My other due date is this thursday. I am going into the midwife on tuesday and I am hoping she will say I have ripened enough to strip my membranes. I have still been working, going to the gym and trying to keep up with laundry, shopping, cleaning, and all that so that when she does make her entrance, everything is ready. I have been getting lots of phone calls, mostly from my folks asking when am I going to have this baby? I wish there was a way to predict it so I could schedule her birth around everyone elses schedule!! At least she didn't come during the Eagles game last night:( Well, here is hoping for Tuesday, or earlier, if she so decides!

Monday, January 08, 2007

Mother Blessing

Yesterday was my mother blessing. It was probably the first time during this pregnancy that I have really been able to fully appreciate this pregnancy for all that it is, and focus on it completely. These past few months have been so hectic, that I haven't really been enjoying the pregnancy. Knowing that this is most likely my last pregnancy, I have wanted to take time to read, journal, and meditate on the beauty of what is occuring within me. This has been difficult to do with all of the other things going on in my life. I felt such a peace by the end of the evening, that I am completely ready for this new life to enter our home.

If you don't know what a mother blessing is, it is basically an alternative to a baby shower. Alexa and Moriah were honored by the little bouques of flowers on the table. There was also a bead bracelet for each of them with 3 beads representing the 3 girls. We opened up our time with prayer and unity by holding hands. Later the ladies went around the room taking turns sharing their blessings. Some brought a bead to string on a necklace I will wear during labor to remind me of the women who are praying for me and give me strength. Others brought a childs book that was special to them in some way and shared about that. We ended by making a web to represent our connectedness. We took a ball of yarn and wrapped it around our arm and threw it to a person across the room who then did the same. Once we all had a piece of the yarn wrapped around an arm, we gently leaned back, tugging on the yarn in the center that had become a web, noticing how strong our connection was. We cut off our yarn, keeping our piece tied around our wrist, which we will keep until either India is born or my milk comes in. Everyone took a votive home to light when I go into labor. We joked, that hopefully it wouldn't burn all the way down before India is born.

We ate lentil soup and bread that the brix's made and hummus, chips and salsa, and of coarse lots of chocoate. Yummy. My belly was making so many funny sounds during the blessing between the lentils, hummus and the chocolate.

After most of the ladies left, Michelle, Amber and Rachel stayed to do a henna design on my belly. It was such a special time for me to focus in on this beauty growing within me, but to also enjoy the shape that I have become .
Moriah wanted to add her design of a smiley face, so I let her have her own special spot on my belly.

Amber gave me a wonderful neck and shoulder massage while Meesh and Rachel did their art work.
There is symbolic meaning to the design. The swirls throughout represent a labrynth to me. I have done some reading and thinking about labrynths lately and how labor can be likened unto it. The unknown can be scary at times. Not knowing if I will be able to have a home birth or hospital birth, not knowing if the baby is healthy, not knowing how my labor will go, and not knowing how I will handle having THREE children... These are all things that I worry about... When going into a labrynth, you don't know what kind of twists and turns will come. It may take longer than you think it will, or it may cause confusion, chaos and pain, but ultimately you know you will get to your destination. As it is with labor. i know i will birth this child, though I don't know how, where or what she will be like. But I know that what ever the process or what she will be like, I know she will be here, ours, but mostly God's, who loves her already and knows her intimately.
The feet, of coarse represent Indias feet. We had to put an extra foot to the side where she is always kicking me. She was kicking a lot while the ladies were drawing. That was fun. And the pomegranite represents fertility. The flower and vines represent life, growth and beauty.

Thank you so much Michelle, Amber and everyone else for making this such an incredible day for me. You will never know how much you blessed me. I love ya'll!


Christmas was so special this year. It was the first year we spent Christmas with just us. We were sad not to be with my family in Richmond, or Chris' in Indiana, but we made the most of it and made it a special bonding time with the girls. On Christmas Eve, we had an evening service at Iglesia. Alexa took part in the service, reading part of a poem about a lamb. She giggled through it but read well. That night, Alexa said that when they woke up the next morning that there would be more gifts because Santa would have come. So we spread all the gifts all over the room so it looked like it was more than it was. They were so cute coming down in the morning. My favorite moment was when Alexa opened the pink hello kitty radio my mom got her. She almost hyperventelated she was so excited. She also got a digital camera that she has been having a lot of fun with. Who knew a 7 yr old could have a digital camera. Well atleast she doesn't have a cell phone yet. Moriah got a piano that she had asked santa for. It is really a keyboard that you hook to the tv and there are games you can play with it. When she opened it, she asked where the legs were. She thought santa would bring her a real piano!
Unfortunately we didn't get many photos because Chris was videoing.
This is Moriah opening up a present from Alexa. She gave her new earrings.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

added photos...

I added some pics to my thanksgiving blog. I took them with film so it took a while to get them developed and then I lost them for about a week.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

The ever growing belly...

Just when I thought I couldn't get any bigger, I have. I have officially gained as much weight as I did my whole pregnancy with Moriah. Well, I am a lot less disturbed by this than the fact that the baby has been sitting so low and continues to get lower every week that my belly measurements are actually getting smaller. Yes, I am dropping and I can feel it in my lower back. Barbara, my midwife, says that I am a fingertip and 50% efaced. She says I have quite a bit of ripening to go, so hopefully I will go tonight or not until the 11th because she is leaving town until then. Also my mom is in Florida this weekend, and my good friend and support person, Michelle is visiting family up north. So, if you are reading this between Jan.3rd and 10th, say a prayer that I will hold off labor. We are getting closer to having the house ready for Indias birth. WE have been cleaning and organizing. My work has let me go down to 8 hr shifts. I have quit teaching aerobics because of the lower back pain. I still go to the gym and walk the dog a lot. I miss aerobics and it is a kick to my pride since I did it to the end with both my other pregnancies. But this pregnancy is so different, and I need to enjoy it for what it is.
We bought a moses basket and a baby swing this past week. I think we have everything now. My next appt with Barbara isn't until the 16th if I haven;t had the baby, and she will help push me into labor if my body is ready for it. For those of you interested, I think this is so cool. She had a client last week who was a week over due. She inserted a 30cc foley vaginally and inflated it in her cervix. It fell out about 4 hrs later, and in another 4 hrs she was in labor. Who knew you could induce labor with a foley!! I have access to them at work... i gave it some thought, but decided I would rather let nature do what it does until the 16th anyways.